Mr. Annoyance

11Apr07

Have you ever been with the most annoying person in this world? I mean, it’s a large world with infinite possibilities and there has to be someone in this world who’s the most annoying of everyone. And there is every chance he works somewhere near my company, and his car breaks down and he commutes by the same bus as me, and worse still, sits next to me.

On that ill-fated morning, when Mr. Annoyance grinned as he sat next to me not even noticing my rather loud “uh-oh”, I knew what was coming up. And I was not to be disappointed. Not on this ill-fated day, when foiling all my attempts to appear disinterested, annoyed, reluctant, this, that, add-all-your-favorite-adjectives, he was determined to ensure nothing worse could happen. Having given up on my lame escapade attempts, I resigned myself into putting up my worst possible smile and mustering enough courage to last the next thirty minutes.

All because, I don’t want to know how he ran into a roadside trash-can when his car broke down, or his fifty grand PDA where he had stored four movies including the one he hid from his wife, and why he hid it from her, or why his mother-in-law was the best of the breed in this world (vairy phunny story!), or what his seven year old daughter thought of Salman Khan, and how fast his kids were growing up (like it took me twenty-six long years to grow this old!). Neither do I need a sermon on how mother-in-laws ought to be (Oh please!), because I’ll never be one, or why her banana chips had too much banana in it, because, I don’t care. You understand English, yes? I said, I don’t care!

Finally the moment of truth arrived and he got up to say “Bye, catch you later”, and brimming with tears I said ‘Bye’, actually meaning to add “But no thanks”. There was an unbelievable relief, but the damage was done and blood had been spilt.

So Mr. Annoyance, the next time you stand in front of your mirror, remember to ask – Mirror mirror on the wall who’s the most annoying of them all. And if it doesn’t show your face, I promise to eat carrots and live in a burrow all my life.

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5 Responses to “Mr. Annoyance”

  1. 1 ranjini

    Ha ha ha. good it was to read and i dont think he is ur boss! I just am imagining to see how it would be with kicha to be with such a boss! sorry i dont want to be so cruel….

  2. 2 prat

    Hilarious!
    I mean, whats going on? I need a cigerette, and I don’t even smoke!

    What I’m getting at is your consistent brilliance. You are just suddenly oh so polished, and your humor is so refined. I mean, what did you do? Teach me also na.

  3. 3 Kishore

    Ranjini,
    heee… just imagine.. ;)

    Prat,
    You are being toooo kind… :)
    And you disappeared after going where u’ve gone, mail me ur number.

  4. ROTFL Just can’t imagine the look on ur face during those 30 minutes :)

  5. 5 Usha

    Oh god, I can see that must have been really really annoying!


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