gifts of fortitude

25May05

I swept myself adrift, wearily enjoying the gifts of providence.

The flow of stream was smooth as ever. A minor jerk here and there, but the flow never curtailed. My energies, bolstered by the ever-prolonging freshness of the brook of life never ceased to swell. Pleasure remained my middle name.

I swept myself adrift, wearily enjoying the gifts of providence. That’s when I met you.

The anguish in my innocent psyche was unimaginable. All that I would have dismissed as a height of juvenile ridicule came roaring up to engulf me. Caught amid whirlpools of tears, reasoning became inert. The composed momentum was a piece of wreck tangled between obvious delusions and obscure certainty. Desolate, ravaged and despondent, I downcast myself into a subdued dame. Distress became my middle name.

I swept myself adrift, lamenting over my lost gifts. That’s when you came back to me.

I began to see light. Perceive the meaning.
Life means to expose myself to the pain of being hurt by someone you trust.
Life means to make my mind up to leap when sleep challenges.
Life means to play tic-tac-toe with my child at one moment and nurse my wife’s wound at the next.
Life means to choose to stay when the world calls.
Life means to stand tall amid ruins.
Life means to confront my son’s birth and dad’s death on the same day.
Life means to say goodbye at your best moment together.
Life means to sit back and wait if you don’t get what you want, because better things are waiting.
Life means to love and to realize that love comes with pain and to still love.
Life means to understand all of this. And more.

I swept myself adrift, distributing my new gifts. Thank you for giving me pain.

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One Response to “gifts of fortitude”

  1. Nice blog. Enjoyed going through it. keep it up the good work. Cheers :)


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